Twenty six years ago, I was listening to a talk by Ms. Toni Rose Gayda at the Yutiam Hall of St. Stephen’s High School. She was recounting to us students how God delivered her from a life of drugs and the illnesses brought about by that form of addiction. Somehow, the word deliverance and illness strike me. Let me tell you why.
I had epilepsy back then. It started when I was four years old. I experienced seizures frequently. I would have epileptic attacks at home, at school, at church. My elementary and high school friends know me to be a sickly person, despite my being an overachiever. I would frequent hospitals, not only for check-ups, but for medical confinements as well. Doctors, blood extractions, medicines were no strangers to me.
Because of this neurological disorder that haunted my childhood and growing-up years, I felt so tired and exhausted. Despite my having an aura (a sense of knowing that I will have an epileptic attack), the stress of the convulsions and the fact that I am not like my peers who are physically strong and who can do whatever they want brought a toll on me.
So when I heard that Someone can deliver me from this illness, I listened intently. That’s how I came to know Him. I bargained, if You can really save me from this illness and heal me completely from this epilepsy, then I am willing to give my life to You. Just take me out of this burden that I bear so early in life.
But it was not that easy. I had to realize I also sinned against Him and that’s what keeping me from a having a close relationship with Him. I had to accept that it is only Him who can save me. But I had to make Him the Lord of my life too. I needed to acknowledge that what He did for me – dying on the Cross – is complete. I had to make a decision. And I did. That day, I received Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior. I laid down my epilepsy on His feet and trusted that He will heal me completely.
I left the place with peace in my heart knowing that Jesus will fulfill His promise to me. No, He did not heal me that instant. But now that I am a grown woman, I have known my Jesus to be the Greatest Healer of all wounds – physical, emotional, spiritual. He heals and makes all things beautiful in His time. My last epileptic attack was when I was in college. It took me around 16 years to experience God’s complete healing. But it was during those 16 fruitful years that Jesus has walked with me closely and revealed Himself to me.
Photo credit: www.calledtokids.com